I have a special treat for you. Today I am going to show you how to make the most pretentious sandwich ever.
First, the bread. Obviously for the most pretentious sandwich ever you have to have the most pretentious bread ever. This may sound like an easy task, but it is. Pretentious bread is made by using only the tallest wheat in the field. ONLY the tallest.
Second, the meat. Oh wait, this is a pretentious sandwich, which means it’s also a vegan sandwich. Yup, that’s right, no roast beef for you. Have fun chewin’ on that air.
Ok, now it’s time for the lettuce. You’ll want to make sure you’ve got completely, 100%, farmer guaranteed, eco friendly, chemical free lettuce. This can only be found in one place. You guessed it, the most pretentious farm in existence. Oh, they also make the pretentious bread. In fact, they have a trendy and fashionable cafĂ© right NEXT to the pretentious farm, and they will make the sandwich for you.
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